NACHO LIBRE / Jared Hess (2006)

July 30th, 2007 by Scott Marks

NACHO LIBRE

Directed by Jared Hess

Written by: Jared Hess, Jerusha Hess and Mike White

Starring: Jack Black, Ana de la Reguera, Héctor Jiménez and Peter Stormare

Running Time: 100 min.

Rating:

Whenever Groucho Marx was asked which of the thirteen Marx Bros. movies his favorite was, he always placed Leo McCarey’s Duck Soup at the top of the list. He was quick to point out that it was the only time in their career that the team was guided by a talented director. Contemporary comics need to listen to their elder’s advice.

After extensive research, I uncovered no relation between the Napoleon Dynamite director and Hitler’s deputy Rudolph Hess. It should have been apparent. Not only was Rudy a better dresser, no matter how warped it was, at least he possessed a vision. I’ve produced diarrhea with more consistency than Jared Hess’ “Nacho Libre.”

Jack Black (becoming more and more self-important with each passing film) plays Nacho, a man who grew from an abandoned orphan to staff cook in a Mexican monastery. In order to save the place from financial ruin, Nacho hatches a plan to make money as a Lucha Libre wrestler. How’s that for a high-concept screen story?

When not exposing his bare midriff, a prime source of the film’s feeble laugh-power, making funny faces and prancing around, Libre is forced to scavenge tasty nachos in order to top off the monasteries otherwise vile provisions. It is on one such hunt that Nacho encounters Esquelito (Héctor Jiménez), an emaciated beggar who functions best as a fraught attempt to come up with another merchandisable character like ND’s Pedro. I’m sure that the filmmakers took great delight in pairing fatty and skinny as tag team partners. No laurels for this barely hardy variation.

This time, the filmmakers add the one ingredient that Napoleon Dynamite couldn’t begin to imagine: a love interest. Nacho is smitten by Sister Encarnación. Instead of casting a Mother Angelica lookalike or yet another facially deformed anomaly, the role went to doe-eyed Mexican beauty Ana de la Reguera. The one lasting truth to be taken from the film is if you can convince a nun to fall in love, you can beat the crap out of a seasoned opponent four times your size.

In order to create an absurd comedy universe one must first establish a set of ground rules with which to play by. The finest of these types of comedies are the ones propelled by their own unique brand of logic. Nacho smears horse dung over Esquelito’s eyes and has him run across a field for bow and arrow practice. How is this supposed to make anyone a better wrestler?

Later, Nacho approaches local wrestling legend Ramses (Cesar Gonzalez) to ask if he would be kind enough to sign some autographs for his band of ragtag orphans. Prior to this we see evidence of Ramses brutality only in the ring. His reaction to Nacho’s request, he throws our hero to the ground, is completely unmotivated. This is convenient, simple-minded character development at its worst. Perhaps I am the crazy one for putting more thought into the film than the writers did.

Produced by Nickelodeon and aimed straight at the hearts of nine-year-old boys, the film has enough fart and doody material to clog a bus terminal’s men’s room. Given the glut of juvenile scatology on display in both of Hess’ films, I was shocked to discover that co-author Jerusha was Jared’s wife, not younger brother.

A colleague was eager to point out that the film employed many of the locals in Oaxaca. She forgot to mention that it employed them as freaks and morons. First off, the film failed to credit the Frito Bandito and Speedy Gonzales as dialogue coaches. There is one painfully unattractive gentleman who is given at least six close-up shots throughout the course of the film. Hess sets us up to think this guy is going to have an impact on the film’s outcome. Perhaps he’s Papa Libre? Instead, he’s simply on display so that we may take mean-spirited delight in his physical ghastliness.

So far this year, Hollywood shat out Date Movie and Grandma’s Boy, thus making it impossible to dub Nacho Libre the worst comedy of 2006. That’s about the nicest thing you will ever get me to say about the film. Hey, Jack. Take Groucho’s advice and next time upgrade to Dennis Dugan.

If you are really desperate for a Mexican wrestling picture, find any of the El Santo epics, or better still Wrestling Women vs. the Aztec Mummy. Whether they knew it or not, these films had more of a stylistic sense when it came to establishing a surreal universe than anything on display here.