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Miley Cyrus: Jamie Lee Curtis blames her parents for topless photo

April 29th, 2008 by Scott Marks

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Is Jamie Lee Curtis steamed because Billy Ray Cyrus didn’t spring for a set of implants for his 15-year-old daughter Miley?

Jamie Lee was one of the first actresses to go public with news of her artificially enhanced sweater meat and couldn’t wait to show off her plastic surgeon’s handiwork in Trading Places. For years she could not keep those things in her blouse and now she’s the first to lecture the starlet.

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Past Perfect

While Jamie was of age when she pontooned up, the motivation remains the same: Money. The only way to better draw attention to ones self than crying foul when scandalous pics are about to hit the newsstands is to get implants and put them on public display. Admit it - what’s the one thing you think of when asked about Trading Places: John Landis’ compelling mise-en-scene and brilliant rewokring of The 3 Stooges Half-Wits Holiday or Jamie nude before the mirror?

The internet will have to wait three more years for Miley to legally appear on Mr. Skin.

Last week a topless photo from Annie Liebovitz’s Vanity Fair photoshoot began making the rounds. Miley wrote an exclusive letter to People magazine expressing her profound regrets. Miley told People, “My goal in my music and my acting is always to make people happy. For Vanity Fair, I was so honored and thrilled to work with Annie. I took part in a photo shoot that was supposed to be ‘artistic’ and now, seeing the photographs and reading the story, I feel so embarrassed.”

As for the scandalous “green bra” webcam pics posted here Miley said “(they) were silly, inappropriate shots. I appreciate all the support of my fans, and hope they understand that along the way I am going to make mistakes and I am not perfect. I never intended for any of this to happen and I am truly sorry if I have disappointed anyone.”

The Disney Channel, which airs Cyrus’ hit show Hannah Montana, also issued a statement about Miley’s recent missteps: “Unfortunately, as the article suggests, a situation was created to deliberately manipulate a 15-year-old in order to sell magazines.”

Cyrus’ parents, who were at the shoot, both left before the photo in question was snapped. Cyrus’ grandmother and teacher were in attendance and neither decided to speak up.

In her defense, Ms. Liebowitz described the picture as “simple” and “beautiful” and says she’s “sorry that my portrait of Miley has been misinterpreted.”

Ms. Curtis, 51, recently underwent a barrage of parodies after posing topless for AARP magazine. Knowing how it feels to be publicly embarrassed, Ms. Curtis must have sympathized with Miley’s tsouris. She tells People, “Of course she is embarrassed. She is a young girl. She shouldn’t have to deal with any of this,” writes Curtis. “I don’t feel that she was duped. I know the integrity of Ms. Leibowitz and the magazine and I know there were people present at the shoot that should have been looking out to make sure that this didn’t happen.”

Note to anyone working with showbiz children: Unless they’re at least 18, it’s wise to keep them clothed. Even Jamie’s Lothario father Tony Curtis, who’s known for liking ‘em young, knows enough to stay away from jail-bait Miley.

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Miley Cyrus flashes her bra in new Disney photo scandal

April 21st, 2008 by Scott Marks

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Remember the good old days when everyone would talk about how big Mouseketeer Annette Funicello’s boobs were without actually seeing them unsheathed? Or when Walt Disney, eager to protect his studio’s reputation, had a conniption fit after his protégé Hayley Mills expressed an interest in playing Lolita?

Were Uncle Walt alive today he’d be desperately kicking and scratching at the inside of his cryogenic chamber. Disney’s house the Mouse built is turning into a chicken ranch for young sluts. First Britney, Christina and Lindsey traded in their lollipops and sasparilla for Camel Lights and Cristal. Last year nude photos of High School Musical star Vanessa Hudgens, then 18-years-old, surfaced on line.

Now it’s squishy-faced Miley Cyrus’ turn. Publicly, the 15-year-old Hannah Montana star espouses her Christian faith and vows to remain celibate until marriage. Just like her role model Britney Spears. In an interview with Barbara Walters, the teen phenomenon said,

“For me, as I know that some people don’t have a family to fall back on like I have. And that’s when something greater comes in and that’s faith and that’s what I have. For me, that’s what keeps me strong. And I think a lot of people do have Christian families and they’re just not seeing that they’re so much greater than the materialistic things that are there right now like going out and that parties and whatever.”

Forget about Jesus. What would Uncle Walt say if he saw the recent photos of Miley flashing her bra and assuming a seductive pose with a male friend that are now flooding the internet? And what about her mullet-headed father Billy Ray Cyrus? Is he poised to achy-break the neck of the young stud putting his paws all over daddy’s little meal ticket?

She’s fifteen-years-old, for Christ’s sake! How much lower is the age for sexualizing nymphets going to drop? Can we expect views of a bare Elle Fanning or how about shots of Suri Cruise strapped to her crib with a red ball in her mouth? As for using religious faith as a shield, it only works for Republicans.

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