Google
 

Groucho Marx & Friends for Hallmark Christmas Cards

December 3rd, 2007 by Scott Marks

hallmark-cards.jpg

The spirit of Christmas as captured on canvas by a cold and distant disciplinarian, Ronald Reagan’s ex-wife, the cheapest man in Hollywood and a cranky old Jew. You know that Fred MacMurray only agreed to do it if they gave him a gross of cards for free.

Thanks to Rob Martinez for the use of the ad!

Tags: , , , , , ,

Filed Under Image Blog, Rants

Dig A Hole: Jane Wyman

September 10th, 2007 by Scott Marks

jane-wyman.jpg

Emulsion Compulsion best remembers Jane Wyman for three things:

  1. She married Anti-Christ Ronald Reagan.
  2. Her appearances in Douglas Sirk’s Magnificent Obsession & All That Heaven Allows.
  3. That preposterously out dated hairstyle. She must have been in competition with Claudette Colbert and Rose Marie to see who could maintain their frumpy coiffeur the longest. Hey, Rose – You Win!

The first time I saw Wyman was in Disney’s endless Bon Voyage. I was in it for My Three Sons’ Steve Douglas and something about her creeped me out. It was her severe helmet hair snapped atop that doughy, childlike, goyish face that gave me the willies: Kindly Mrs. Santa Claus sporting an Oakland Raiders’ helmet.

She was never much of an actress. Pat Hitchcock had more screen presence in Stage Fright. Johnny Belinda, her Oscar-winning role has purposely escaped my gaze on numerous occasions. Just what I want to see: a Jean Negulesco picture featuring a sexless Jane playing a deaf mute. The nicest thing one can say about her performances in both Sirk melodramas is that she was used well.

Towards the end she became something akin to Dale “Queen of Christianity” Evans or Loretta Young once she put her whoring ways aside and found Jesus. Ms. Wyman was 93. Must be something in those God-fearing Republican genes…

Six Degrees of Violent Insanity: Bob Hope Presents the Chrysler Theater and appearing as Hope’s wife in the unspeakably inept, unintentionally side-splitting How to Commit Marriage.

Tags: ,

Filed Under Obituaries