DVD Review: THE BAREFOOT CONTESSA / Joseph L. Mankiewicz (1955)
November 21st, 2008 by Scott Marks
The Barefoot Contessa (1954)
Written and Directed by Joseph L. Mankiewicz
Starring: Humphrey Bogart, Ava Gardner, Edmond O’Brien, Rossano Brazzi, Valentina Cortese, Marius Goring, Bessie Love and Enzo Staiola
Running Time: 130 min.
Aspect Ratio: 1.75:1
Photographed by Jack Cardiff in 
Rating: 
Please do not read unless you have seen the film.
What would have happened if Rita Hayworth had carried on a torrid affair with Howard Hughes? It certainly would have amounted to something a lot more lively than the last hour of The Barefoot Contessa.
For it’s first third, Joseph L. Makiewicz’s Hollywood-at-Cinecetta-on-Hollywood, succeeds at scrutinizing cinema in a manner similar to his evisceration of the Broadway set in his smash hit All About Eve. Harry Dawes (Humphrey Bogart), a writer, director five months off the bottle and on his knees for a job, hitches his faded star to billionaire and would-be movie financier Kirk Edwards (Warren Stevens). Edwards is a consummate prick. Arrogant, demanding and cruel though he may be, it’s his dime and he expects a big bang for his buck. Oscar Muldoon (Edmond O’Brien), Edwards’ PR flunky, is a walking torrent of flopsweat. He could put a positive spin on anything while personally detesting all human behavior.
The two men travel with Edwards to Spain in order to scout a south of the border senorita’s nightclub act. The director chose to conceal Maria Vargas’ (Ava Gardner) one and only nightly performance. Viewers don’t see so much as a tapping ankle. Maria’s song and dance is reflected through reaction shots of the spectators.The Americano big shots arrive late and Kirk demands a command performance, something Maria has never agreed to. After Oscar falls flat on his face, Bogart is reluctantly called into action to use his brains and manipulative skills to get Kirk what he wants. The big joke is none of the three films Maria Vargas lived to star in were produced by Kirk Edwards. He never produced anything. Kirk delights in playing at producer almost as much as Maria enjoys whoring herself.
We know from the get-go that this is a set-’em-up-to-watch-’em-die Hollywood biopic. Maria’s funeral is cheapened by an offscreen appearance by the Rome Fire Department presssed into service and their mighty hoses transformed into rain machines. The gushing hoses cause the water to flop down in clumps as opposed to studio controlled rain-bars that uniformly disperse the droplets. Four reels later finds it properly done and presumably after the Hollywood-in-exile company sent back to L.A. for the correct gear.
Harry and Oscar share the film’s narration, a rarity at the time. Harry takes us through the introductory passages where we first set eyes on the ravishing Maria making nice to some greasy gaucho behind her dressing room curtain. Forgive my fetishistic indulgence, but that introductory shot of Ms. Gardner’s fair tootsie with a golden bracelet clinging to its ankle could be sold as a two-minute freeze frame on an adult pay site.
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